Yes I know often times it is not politically correct to say “Merry Christmas” but this is what I celebrate and believe so I really hope you enjoy the season and remember it means much more than just presents and Santa Claus.

I also wish you a Happy New Year…that it may be prosperous and bring new and exciting things.

I have been really busy today, actually this entire week.  I am filling in for our regular 4 o’clock producer (so I have been writing a lot).

I just wanted to quickly say Merry Merry Christmas to everyone.  Loved ones, friends, co-workers… have a blessed holiday

Also, look up ‘Jack Bauer interrogates Santa’ on You Tube… it’s funny stuff.

There is less than one week until I take on the Harlem Globetrotters….AHHH. I’m so excited!

Well this week I got to be a part of Imagination Station’s half time show video where, in light of the game, they conducted a demonstration to show exactly what happens when you deep freeze a basketball and then drop it from 20 feet in the air. Click below to see!

But wait! That’s not all! While we were waiting for the ball to deep freeze, we were standing next to this really cool human Yo Yo type exhibit…and the awesome staff at Imagination Station let me try! Check it out! And then go to Imagination Station because there really is something there for everyone, no matter how old you are!!

I really hope my previous post did not come across negatively.

Honestly, I am so grateful for sooooooooo many things, the people I’ve met, and I was thinking about this as my day started.

My parents, like any other traditional Asian parents, were quite strict, but in looking back, I see that they were going for the greater good.

They wanted the best future for my sister and I.  They saved money in order to pay for our tuition, no matter how difficult that would be to get me to Syracuse while my sister was still in school.

They had their moments where I wished maybe things were different, but today, I can see that as I’m no longer the teenager I used to be, there seems to be a sense of pride that hey, you know what?  All their work, all their sacrifice produced two people that they seem to be proud of.

And that’s what makes me really proud… when I can see their pride exuding from their smiles; when my dad wears a Syracuse cap on his daily walks through the park.  No, his son didn’t go to the typical Asian-American destination of an Ivy League program or the University of Texas, his son went to Syracuse, and not too many of his acquaintances can make that claim.

Thinking about this… it makes me smile.

And it makes me miss them.

That unconditional love.  No matter what I do, they’re in my corner.  If I do something bad, they wouldn’t necessarily be mad AT me, they’d be more worried about what would happen TO me.

Same with my sister.  Unconditional.  And with her, she knows more about my inner soul because I’ve always been able to lean on her through thick and thin.  Recently, she let me know that she knows she can count on me because she knows I’d try my best to support her no matter what, and that meant a lot.

To feel that pride from her… well, I’ve got the same for her.  She’s done some great things.  She has this thirst for knowledge that’s unbelieveable.  Her friends adore her because she is so genuine.

And to my best friends that I have met in Calgary, Houston, Syracuse and all the places that I have worked – I would die for you if  need be.  I would kill for you if need be.  That’s what it is.  If that’s controversial, so be it.  That’s called TRUE LOYALTY.  You mess with my family, my bruthas, you mess with me.  That’s what it is.

And so it goes – a Christmas will be spent without a lot of these people, but I am so so grateful that I have met ALL these people in the first third of my life.

Today my News Director stumped me with a trivia question.  He asked me why a candy cane has red and white stripes and is the shape it is…  I had no idea but was fascinated when he shared the story with me.  Apparently he learned of this story while at church with his kids.  I enjoyed the story so much I wanted to share it with you.  Perhaps some of you have not heard of this and will pass the details along.  It is certainly season appropriate.  Happy Holidays! 

As the story goes…  A candymaker in Indiana wanted to make a candy that would remind people of the true meaning of Christmas; so he made the candy cane to incorporate several symbols for the birth, ministry, and death of Jesus Christ. He began with a stick of pure white, hard candy. White to symbolize the Virgin Birth and the sinless nature of Jesus, and hard to symbolize the Solid Rock, the foundation of the Church, and the firmness of the promises of God.

The candymaker then shaped his cane into the form of a “J” to represent the precious name of Jesus, who came to the earth as Savior. It could also represent the staff of the “Good Shepherd” with which He reaches down to to reclaim the fallen lambs who, like sheep, have gone astray.

Thinking that the candy was somewhat plain, the candymaker stained it with red stripes. He used three small stripes to show the stripes of the scourging Jesus received. The large red stripe was for the blood shed by Christ on the cross so that we could have the promise of eternal life.

And I am. Especially after reading Howard Chen’s recent blog post.

Don’t get me wrong — I’m not saying Howard Chen’s not grateful. He is one of the most easy-going and life-loving people I’ve ever met, despite the fact that he’s gone from city to city readjusting to different stations, populations and cultures.

Some people can’t take that and keep a huge smile on their face — you know, like the one Howie walks around with. I don’t think I could.

And that’s my point — I’m lucky. I’ve lived in this area all my life and, quite frankly, plan on staying here. It’s true that in the television business there’s a lot of moving around, jumping from market to market trying to find that perfect place.

And while I haven’t ruled that out completely (and, bosses, I’m talking much, much further down the road — so please don’t mention this post in a staff meeting. Thanks.), I’ve started laying down other roots in the community.

I’ve recently started working as a part-time firefighter for the City of Rossford after getting a bit of motivation (fueled by jealousy — the good kind) from photographer Mike Thompson, who joined the Perrysburg Township Fire Department in October.

I’m also in the process of becoming an auxiliary sheriff’s deputy. I can’t say too much about this yet, being that I’ve still got a way to go, but it’s something I’m really looking forward to doing in addition to my work with FOX Toledo.

Strengthening the concrete that’ll keep me here in Toledo: my family’s here. Unlike Howie, my grandma lives 10 minutes away, I go to dinner with my parents once a week and see almost all my relatives at least three or four times a year.

The most geographically-distant relatives are my aunt, uncle and cousins who live in Lansing.

(sidenote: I’ve extremely proud of my cousin Amelia — High School Swimmer of the Year and future Golden Gopher. So, yeah, she’ll be a bit further away then, but college doesn’t count. [side-sidenote: my grandpa's even prouder. We've watched the video of her winning states at least three times.])

Anyway, before I drag this thing on too long, I’m just happy. Happy to be close to family, happy to be branching out into other fields, and happy to have friends like Howard Chen who really put things into perspective and make me appreciate life even more.

Now that I’ve met my sappiness quota for the year, I’m going to get back to work…

It’s almost Christmas.  It’s almost New Year’s.

Yet somehow, there’s a part of me that feels empty.

I know, I know… showing something from the inside is commonly perceived as weakness, but honestly, I don’t give a hoot because I’m just speaking what is on most broadcasters’ minds.  Well, this is more representing those broadcasters who’ll be celebrating the holidays away from home.

See, my family’s down in Houston.  My relatives are in Calgary, California, Australia, China and Taiwan.  That’s NOWHERE near Toledo.

Also, in the current economic times, I’m not going to lie when I say that instead of trying to bankroll two one-week trips home, I’m making one two-week trip, so part of this is on me.

But it’s the nature of the business that I have chosen – so that’s another thing that’s on me.

People talk about this being a dream job.  For the most part, it really is pretty cool.  I get to go to whatever games I want.  The exhilaration of these contests is like no other.  When somebody makes a great play and you’re there to see it in person and on the field or court, wow.  It is awesome.

But it comes with a price.

Ask even the sportscasters at ESPN.  It’s hard to balance the on-air part of it with the off-air part of it.  The ESPN guys (over 90% of them) are either single, divorced, or married finally at about the age of 50.  Or still trying to find that special somebody at the age of 50.

Are their families nearby?  If they’re lucky, they are.

For this individual case in Toledo, my family’s not close by.

Now the bright side of all this is that I’ve come to appreciate that unconditional love a whole lot more.  But that doesn’t mean I don’t miss them.

I spoke with my older sister this morning and the fun that she’s having in Houston. Man, it’s great to hear her having this great time, but it also makes me feel like my youth is being taken away from me.  Toledo has everything that is necessary to live, but I think even the proudest Toledoan would admit it’s not fair to compare it to an LA or Houston or Philly or Boston.

I may enjoy the actual job itself, but………..

And therein lies the rub.  I’ve learned that life is so much more than the job itself.  I’ve had to live for the past 11 years without what I grew up with.  Imagine (for most of you) if all of a sudden your world was Chinatown.  Everybody around you was either Chinese or some other Asian nationality.  Nothing authentically Caucasian or African American around you except the same English language being spoken.  Feeling a little out of place even if everybody’s friendly to you.  Not really being able to talk about it with most people because they just straight-up wouldn’t understand.  Imagine this for more than a third of your life after you grew up in a totally diverse environment.  Think about it.

Like I said, everybody’s been friendly to me.  I am so grateful for the friends that I’ve made here.  I’ve become like brothers with the roommates that I’ve come across.  Their families have been gracious enough to include me in either their Thanksgiving or Christmas festivities.

After all, and I’m guessing it’s probably been like three years, I honestly can’t remember the last time I spent Christmas with my family in Houston.

I have always said that I would get a puppy as soon as I moved into my first post college apartment. Well here I am, it’s a dog friendly building, and every time I see my neighbor’s adorable puppy, I start seriously considering the idea. If I do get a puppy, I think I want it to look something like the ones below: little and fluffy with a loveable face. I think maltipoos are so cute, and because I had a miniature poodle growing up (the best dog in the world) I think I’d like whatever I picked to be at least part poodle.

But then I met Julia Johnston’s dog, (also pictured below) who is so cool! She does tricks and she’s really cute, and now I’m thinking that maybe I’d like a medium sized dog. However then I’d feel bad because I don’t have a backyard that she could run around in, and my little apartment would be far more exciting for a smaller dog.

Then I’m thinking about training the puppy…I don’t know if I’m ready to commit to that. Perhaps I should wait until the weather is warmer to consider this because I don’t know how keen I am to the idea of taking the pup out on walks all the time in the cold winter wilderness.

What do you think? Dog or no dog; big or small dog; act now or act later?

Page 8

“I beg your pardon,” I shouted back “I LOVED you with all my heart, but you never loved me in return Gray.  You made my life miserable.  I am with Sam now, Sam is my husband so leave me alone please!” I calmly yelled and walked away.

“Oh so it’s all about Sam now huh?  He’s the guy who’s supposedly the father of your unborn child.  Did you tell him Lee?  Did you tell him Lee that you and I made love while you were engaged to Mr. Perfect?” he stated.

I stopped in the middle of the hallway.  Gray was right this could possibly be his child.  Oh what have I gotten myself in to?  I’m really screwed now.  Someone told Gray that I was pregnant but whom?  The only people who knew was my mother, my sister, Sam and Paula.

“Lee, you have to believe me…I love you, I do, and you know you love me,” Gray said.

I turned back around. I knew my heart, but I wasn’t going to let him deliberately destroy it again. “That’s where you’re wrong Gray, I love Sam, or have you forgotten how you treated me all those years.  Do you remember Gray? It’s quite fresh in my mind or better yet should I refresh your memory?”  I said and walked away for good.

——-

That Sunday Afternoon (Years Ago)

Lord, I don’t want him to go.  I want him to stay with me forever.

“Hey so I’ll call you when I get to Miami.” Gray said as he lifted his bags out of the car.

“Ok, you take care, and please call,” I said with tears in my eyes.

“Hey I will, I promise,” he said followed by a kiss on the lips.

“I love you Gray,” I said.  Now why did I say that knowing he’s not going to say…

“I love you too Lee,” he replied as he walked into the airport.

He actually said he loved me.  I can’t believe it I’m shocked. I wanted to dance in the middle of the street.  Gray Jackson finally confessed his love to me, to me Leeanne Smith.  I kissed the driver and got in the car.  Who can I call?  Who can I tell?  Oh, my God this is finally happening to me.  Gray loves me.  I smiled all the way home.

That Sunday Night

As Yolanda and I watched our Sunday night lineup on HBO, I waited patiently for the phone to ring hoping it would be Gray.

The phone rings

“Hello?” I answered quickly

“Hello Lee, how are you darling?” the caller said.

Darn, it isn’t Gray, it’s Yolanda’s mother.

“Hi Mrs. Patterson, how are you doing?” I asked out of respect.

“Fine thank you, is Yolanda ‘ome?” she asked.

“Yes Maam, hold on one second,” I said as I passed the phone to her.

Before I gave Yolanda the phone I told her, that I was expecting a call from someone very important, but she knew who it was and didn’t seem to care.

“Lee just give me the bloody phone,” she said jokingly.

Yolanda and her mother must have talked for an hour, but no call came through to me.  Maybe he lost my number,  maybe he’s not ok.  Those questions ran throughout my head until midnight before I decided to call him.

I dialed his number and the phone rang 7 times before his voice message picked up.  I left a message, but he never called back.

Chapter 6: The Honeymoon

Hawaii is a great place to go to relieve stress.  Sam’s father has a beach house in West Maui.  He let us use it for the weekend.  The weather was so nice and the breeze just felt great on my skin.  On our way to Hawaii, I tried to forget what had happened at the reception.

“Lee, sweetie, everything is going to be great,” Sam said to me as he sprawled next to me on the sand.  “You’ll see, I’ll take care of you and Jr. for the rest of my life.  You are my queen, and I am your king, whatever your wish is my command.”

Things like that, made me love Sam more and more everyday.  He has always been there for me.  Please Lord, I pray, please forgive me for what I have done.

“Sam, I love you, I really do,” I passionately responded and kissed him.

“Lee, do you remember the first time we actually dated?” he asked

“Yes, I remember quite vividly, I was the one who paid for it right?” I replied.  How could I ever forget our first date, it was one of the most interesting days of my life.

————————————————————

One Year Later and Still No Word  (Years Ago)

A shrink wasn’t the answer and my mother couldn’t help me either.  I swear these pills looked decent right about now. It’s been a whole year, a whole darn year and no word from Gray. I knew he wasn’t dead for sure because he played during the season.  No word from the punk. I wanted to scream, I wanted to kill him and then kill myself.  I sat and asked myself everyday what had happened.  What did I do wrong?  I cried every night before I fell asleep, that was the only way I  could doze off.  I did that for the whole year until one day I received a knock on my door. Without looking through the peep whole I opened the door.

“Lee, hey,” Gray said.

No this isn’t real, this isn’t real at all.

______________________________________________

Tune in next week.

Christmas is quickly approaching and I have so much to do! I have been racking my brain all week for easy meal ideas for the 25th and I believe I have just about completed my menu.

There is one item I must make by request of my entire family. If I don’t I’ll be raked over the coals. It is my chocolate truffle cheesecake. I have been making it since high school. I got the recipe from my friend’s mother many years ago.

The recipe is actually very easy. I promise it is worth the effort. It only take about 15 minutes (or less) the throw together and I swear it tastes like you spent hours on it. So, here is my holiday gift to you. Let me know how your turns out.

Chocolate Truffle Cheesecake

Here’s what you need for the cheesecake:

3 – 8 ounce packages of cream cheese
1 – 14 ounce can of sweetened condensed milk
4 – eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
2 cups semi sweet chocolate chips

Here’s what you’ll need for the crust:

1 ½ cups vanilla wafer crumbs
½ cup confectioners’ sugar
1/3 cup unsweetened cocoa power
1/3 cup butter

Directions:

1) Preheat you oven to 300 degrees
2) For the crust – mix together the vanilla wafers, confectioners’ sugar, cocoa and butter. Press then in to the bottom of a springform pan.
3) For the cheesecake – melt together the chocolate chips
4) Mix together the cream cheese, condensed milk, eggs, vanilla, and chocolate. You wiill want the mixture to be very smooth.
5) Pout everything in to you crust. (As a time saver you can use to store bought crusts.)
6) Bake at 300 degrees for 55 minutes. It may look like it is not done in the center, but it will continue to bake out of the oven and be set by the time it cools.
7) Enjoy!